Life's a little funny

Hi again,

Let's see. What to rant about today. I don't have the following to really just let loose on a random subject which I happen to feel aggrieved about, but then, at the same time, no-one actually reads this blog, so who cares. That deserves a question mark, but really, it doesn't.

Today I am a little annoyed about losing creative control of an idea. But my personal feelings aren't really important (well obviously they are to me but I don't think I can be funny and not hideously offensive, or at least bitter, so I won't say anything).

Let's see. War in Iraq (possibly Civil), China and Taiwan sabre rattling, Iran enriching nuclear arms. Pretty much business as usual, but we all seem shocked, I just think the late 80s and 90s were pretty damn peaceful for the western world, because of this we've already forgotten the cold war and the amount of stress and pressure involved. Now either it's all going to kick off and there will be a nice cathartic war, after which the winners decide on the moral right for about twenty years, or it's just going to keep building into more and more bad blood, eventually leading to war. I would say that with the right political leadership, this could be avoided, but having seen the leaders we elect these days, mainly under the influence of the media, I don't reckon any of them are going to sort anything out...

Oh and on the whole danish cartoon thing, I have to say, and a lot of my muslim friends agree with me, CHILL THE FUCK OUT. So some newspaper in a majority non-muslim country broke a piece of religious dogma (as opposed to scripture [Church law made up by priests rather than the written word of god/allah]). This does not justify any of the protests given in the Islamic world in the name of religion. People in christian countries and islamic countries break the ten and two commandments all the time. Especially the press. And we definitely do not burn down the embassy of any countries involved.

Fundamentalists of every genre are impossible to reason with, and shouldn't be. They should not be respected as being holier than thou. Use the mind God/Allah/Jehovah/Many other gods gave you for enquiry and decision. Do not absolve responsibility for your own life and decisions...

The people are the people, they may need to be led, but they should never be driven.

Athenios

I could call it something like long time no see, but that would imply I do this regularly and have readers.

Well hey then,

As promised, I've fallen off the wagon again and need to bitch to the blogsphere. Just cos I can, and safe in the knowledge that anyone reading doesn't care, it's better than the best shrink, you get to get your shit out in the open and then walk away, cos you know what you should do to sort out your problems yourself most of the time, you just need someone to bitch to.

And it's only a bottle and a half of red wine tonight. Anyway, I could say it's women that have brought me back to this once again, but it isn't. I mean yes, I've had the most torrid love life experience of my life in the last few weeks involving no fewer than TWO actual women involved and at least three hundred who seemed to think they were (and before you jump to conclusions, I didn't cheat {cos I wouldn't} and I didn't get a threesome ({d'Oh}). What's wrong with sleeping with best mates? I mean, they like each other right? so surely they can appreciate the qualities I'd see as attractive in their mate? After we'd totally and completely finished between us apart from maybe when I got drunk and lonely?

Right, I don't come out of that last paragraph particularly well.

Well, combine that with an absolute lack of direction in my life right now, and the fact that I liked the first mate far better than the second (who was hotter) and now am trying damn hard to get back to being friends with the first, I'm in a pretty dark place right now.

I know I had a reason to blog tonight and the weirdest thing is, as much as I've said, I know none of that is it. I've completely forgotten what it is.

Ah well, quote time:

Half way there is not an achievement.

Athenios

Betelgeuse

Obviously I'm just going for most posts in a night (for me).

But ask any astrophysicist (of which I am partially qualified)

It is a star that has been behaving strangely. and if it does top itself we are all dead, so don't worry about surfing, economics or penguins.

The only comforting about Betelgeuse blowing up is that in all likelihood the gamma rays would fry us before the particle wave and nuclear winter (and the neutrino burst might well kill us all anyway).

For an In depth Analysis of: Men (a majority part of me made me say that), Astrophysics, or Life in general, contact your local best mate, then me.

"There are few people who can accept failure." Make friends with these people, they will rule the world very soon unless we stop them.

Athenios

Obviously some of my audience (and maybe some of me)

Is pissed off with the last post.

But, let's be fair, there wasn't much wrong there.

As an Incidental I recommend the Merchant Mariners Memorial near tower hill at sunset in the summer. Or autumn. I may well be there, as it is one of the prettiest places in london. And the sacrifices made by those who are named there will never (barring my directorship) be in a film in hollywood. Thus no promotional material. I feel bad for sharing my place with you, as I feel memorials should be visited or not by choice, not guilt. If you feel you owe the person in the memorial before you walk in. Don't go. Afterwards, if you don't feel you owe them, please feel free to die horribly.

Plus seek out those who fought/ took the risk for you, and treat them as well as all the dead. Respect. Honour. Faith. (and the willingness to die for others)

Without Honour there is no Shame,
Without Shame, there is no Guilt,
Without Guilt, there is no Fun.

Athenios

Men

Men are strange creatures.

As anyone can guess, I have, yet again fallen off the wagon. (with a splash). Otherwise I wouldn't let the rest of me do this (but we fight back later).

So much of a splash, that not only can I not only remember what I wrote last time, I can't even be bothered to look it up.

From one half of me:
Men are stubborn
Men are stupid
Men are infuriating
Men are violent
Men are insensitive
Men are odd
Men are a woman's worst nightmare

And from the other (A response):
Men are Faithful
Men are Romantic
Men are a Mystery
Men are Protective
Men are Tolerant
Men are Simple
A woman can either be a man's heaven or his hell.

As always I hope I'm quoted but my real effort tonight is to drink three bottles of red wine and not show it tomorrow.

As always we enjoy the expression of our opinions, and thank you for reading them.

Until the next time we're off the wagon.

Goodnight

Oh wait quote:

There is nothing worse than a meaningless death. It harms many and succours few.

Athenios

Well then

Maybe I've lost you all,

but then to be fair, my aim of converting the depressed masses to at least care about my problems, even if they can't manage their own must seem to have come to an ignominious end.

So, no more (e)self-aggrandising, no more real rants.

For any real fans, I've cut the ex out of my life, have had a love affair with a really lovely woman that went entirely wrong entirely through my own fault, and have got scary amounts of power in my job.

Not looking for a blog where everything goes right? or everything goes wrong? look here, it's entirely dull, and only updated as often as people care...

Apparently 57% of the world does not believe that their country is governed by the will of the people... aaaaaaagh. Vote, or if you don't believe in voting, set fire to a polling station, just don't let it go by. Make it personal. Make it big and loud and don't worry about making it clever, they'll make it clever after the event if it matters. These days the main thing is to just DO something, anything...

Huntingdon Life Sciences may have been closed down by maybe20-30 people. This should give you an idea of the effect a few people can have if they disregard the rules...

Dance like no-one is watching, fight like everyone is...


Athenios

OK then, Sorry it's been a While, and Life Adjustment

Right then,

You may or may not have guessed by now, I am a Londoner. I was (to be fair I changed off and am not trying to boast simply trying to establish my legitimacy) on one of the Tube trains that blew up.

Now we all spent the day watching the news and panicking. I work for a very large multinational with a large office tower in the Docklands. The Docklands were locked down (no one allowed in) for the whole day. We had to leave via boat, as the tubes and Buses were not running (obviously). The DLR reopened and fair play that was a good move, but for those of us going west, it was pretty much no use at all....


Anyway, the whole point of this is, I am going back to work this week not because I am not terrified, but because I know that my company may not fire me, but in todays competitive arena for jobs, will mark me down as the person who wussed out and didn't come into work.

In summary, the terrorists could blow us up, but my company will definitely blackball me... which one would you choose?

Also it's not bravery that forces us back onto the tubes, we just have no choice, I've heard that passenger numbers on friday and monday were only slightly down on normal, and this was put down to the "blitz spirit", actually, I have not had such bad experiences on the tube ever, the fact that almost everyone travelled on severely reduced services shows how dependant we are on the tube.

Many companies showed their Corporate Social Responsibility on thursday and friday by letting people leave early or not come in. Surely it would be more responsible for (let's say) large banks to keep their staff in in order to keep services going for clients rather than cancelling anything.

Basically, from a cynical working Londoner, I will take the tube, not because I am brave or defiant, but because I have to. I will go to work, because otherwise they would fire me. And I will hate the people who did this and push for the death penalty, because they took that power onto themselves and decided to kill dozens of innocent civilians.

On other points: I'm glad we won the oympics simply in response to Chirac's awful bigotism and anti-Britishness, but I did see a great comment on a board of a man claiming to not be racist: The Phrase : "Cheese Eating Surrender Monkeys". Now I don't believe any of those things of the french (cos we eat more cheese and they fought us for 130 odd years without surrendering).

Also, for the English looking for a response to Aussie Cricketing gags:

Australian Customs Officer: So Sir, do you have any criminal convictions?
Brit: I didn't think that was still necessary.

Everyone, put the ICE number into your phones, (In Case of Emergency) and peace be with you all.

London is too big to be stopped by terrorists, whatever they do; unfortunately.

Athenios supports the London Bomb Victim fund set up by the Red Cross.

Please, whatever your religion, stand up against terrorism, simply because it never hurts those who make the decisions simply the innocent.

I do not accept the arguments of those who say: This is not and Islamic war.... If the terrorists are claiming it is in the name of Islam, surely it should be the Muslims who would be the most vocal in chasing them down, their meek acceptance of these acts implies at least a slight sympathy with the goals of the bombers. I am a religious person, proud to live in a secular society, where all beliefs are allowed, as long as they do not contravene civil law (earthly law for some religions), now I have never seen a religion which encourages the killing of innocents, or the classifying of those who should be killed in such broad terms as "anyone on a tube at ten to nine" . But if someone of my religion was killing people in this manner I would expect the leaders of the faith to expel them and raise the faithful against them (not physically, but morally) thus cutting out any suport they might have. If there were no Muslim Imam's preaching about the immorality of western culture and the need for it to be punished, this would not have happened. I encourage all peace loving people of the world to stand up against these cowards and report them to the civil authorities if you can.

salaam

Shalom

Peace be with you all.

I apologise for spelling, but I did not have as long on this post as the others.

Athenios

Psycho Hose Beasts, and other Exes

Seriously, most of us, and,
to be fair,
not all of us,
have been in relationships.

Now, when a relationship comes to an end there are several options: (this list is not exhaustive and not approved by the Motion Picture Association of America {although what is?})

1) Guy leaves girl for another girl for a couple of reasons:
a) she's hotter than you, deal with it.
b) she does kinky stuff and puts out more than you: two reasons,
i) she's a complete slut and you aren't
ii) He wasn't that into you, and so never really tried, but with the new foxy one, he's on his way. (But he'll never get the emotional connection that he had with you, seriously, he'll miss it...... MAIN POINTER HERE, do not let him have the emotional (chat) connection with you while fucking the slut, otherwise he's got it made. If you want him back, tease at long distance, if you don't, tease at long distance, and then when it all goes wrong, turn him down..
c)He wasn't really that into you in the first place for again several reasons:
i) You were a rebound or filler girlfriend. (I.e. straight after another relationship, or after a long dry spell)
ii) He's secretly gay. Stays pretty much a constant throughout your life (as in most of them(?) come out) but as a proportion of the single population the amount of non-heteros stays pretty much the same (may actually increase int later (35+) singlehood.
iii) You were interference for another girl (as in he was dating both of you just to get her) now before you say this is harsh, an average guy's success rate with women is around one in ten, so if you are the fallback option, deal with it. {also if he is in some long-term screwy thing with either an ex or a long term platonic friend, you have about a fifty-fifty and can't be pissed when it goes wrong.}


2) Girls dumping guys.
Basically it's always because the guys don't listen. this may or may not be a lie.

As in, yes, you are the bad boy, tall, dark haired, hottie with the six pack who I lost my virginity to, but you don't listen to me.

or

Yes, I Know you've listened to every problem I've had for five years, solved all my shit, sorted out my phobias and won a Nobel peace prize, but you don't listen to me like Juan my Mexican Masseur does.

Now did you spot which one was which?
Seriously though, in the first case, you don't need any advice, cos come on let's face it, you were probably already cheating.
In the second one, if she hasn't already come to you, then you are pretty much already dumped, and will feel like everything you ever cared about suddenly turned round and told you to fuck off.

a) You don't listen / Don't understand me.
Women are complex creatures, your random watching sports while drinking beer and letting us talk does not satisfy us. {Try listening to the last comment only and answering, or the even better but not for the proud "You are absolutely right, I am so sorry."}
[or it's a complete lie and it's an entire different reason, but because you didn't listen earlier you missed it, schmuck]
b) It's not you, it's me.
To be fair, used by both sexes, but more so by women. People use this cos they think it is less hurtful than, "I just can't stand being with you anymore", because it is true, it is them, they can't stand you anymore, whereas you probably still love them...
c) My friends / Parents / whoever thinks we are a bad couple.
Really, you should have spotted this when you said "let's cook out" and he said "ok, I brought a spoon and the Skag, have you got some water and a needle?"
But let's face it, the sex is far better than those preppy boys we were brought up on. (Although, there is something to be said for a man who doesn't fart during sex)
d) I just need some time/space/whatever
I'm fucking one of your mates, deal with it.

On the whole psycho hose beast thing, I assume it's from a relationship where you know they're crazy, but deal with it, cos when they are in a relationship they just pray crazy away from you, but when you let go of them, pure crazy goes everywhere, including you and all your mates, like a hose whipping around once it's been let go.


Right, I may have glossed over Homosexual (techincally this includes Lesbians so don't get pissed and report me to any sort of forum) relationships, but, having had a punt at some of these, I realise you basically get the worst of both world's at the beginning, but then in later life get far better, I would envy you if I didn't want to have kids and raise them with their natural living parents (as is my goal in life).

Once again, if anyone is reading, agreeing or disagreeing, let me know, and I guarantee answers, (not cos I'm desperate, more cos I really love interacting with people {especialy strangers because tey have so much new to say}).


Next Column, world economy, readers letters and any points I come up witj
The One after that, Abortion, Stem Cell Research, and Pro-lifers.

These may be swapped according to popular demand, but of course, it's only the intelligent answers (or the REALLY ignorant) that I pay attention to

as always.

Be yourself, because most people aren't very convincing otherwise.

Athenios